{"id":574,"date":"2024-07-23T18:28:54","date_gmt":"2024-07-23T22:28:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/?p=574"},"modified":"2025-01-28T23:40:49","modified_gmt":"2025-01-29T04:40:49","slug":"the-changeling-game-chapter-49","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/the-changeling-game-chapter-49\/","title":{"rendered":"The Changeling Game, Chapter 49"},"content":{"rendered":"<style type=\"text\/css\">\ntt {\nfont: .857em menlo, monaco, consolas, monospace;\nmargin: auto;\n}\nh2 {\ntext-align: center;\n}\nh2.chapterhead {\nmargin-bottom: 2em;\ntext-align: center;\n}\n  .nowrap {\n    text-indent: 0;\n    display: inline-block;\n}\n<\/style>\n<p><b>Title:<\/b> The Changeling Game <small>(Formerly <i>Identity Theft<\/i>)<\/small><br \/>\n<b>Author:<\/b> Ardath Rekha<br \/>\n<b>Chapter:<\/b> 49\/?<br \/>\n<b>Fandom:<\/b> <i>Pitch Black<\/i> (2000); <i>The Chronicles of Riddick<\/i> (2004); <i>The Chronicles of Riddick: Dark Fury<\/i> (2004)<br \/>\n<b>Rating:<\/b> M<br \/>\n<b>Warnings:<\/b> Adult themes, controversial subject matter, harsh language, violence<br \/>\n<b>Category:<\/b> Gen<br \/>\n<b>Pairing:<\/b> None<br \/>\n<b>Summary:<\/b> Jack\u2019s interpretation of part of the eclipse story, as she tells it, becomes a bone of contention and spurs a long-overdue intervention\u2026 but will it help <i>enough?<\/i><br \/>\n<b>Disclaimer:<\/b> The characters and events of <i>Pitch Black,<\/i> <i>The Chronicles of Riddick,<\/i> and <i>The Chronicles of Riddick: Dark Fury<\/i> are not mine, but belong to Universal Studios.  I just <i>wish<\/i> I were in charge of their fates.  No money is being made off of this.  I\u2019m writing strictly for love of the story.<br \/>\n<b>Feedback:<\/b> Absolutely, the more the better!  Shred me, whip me, beat me, make me feel grammatical! I post \u201crough,\u201d so I can always use the help. \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n<input type='hidden' bg_collapse_expand='6a8e7254e80689042562102' value='6a8e7254e80689042562102'><input type='hidden' id='bg-show-more-text-6a8e7254e80689042562102' value='Long post is long. Click to read the story.'><input type='hidden' id='bg-show-less-text-6a8e7254e80689042562102' value='Hide the story again.'><button id='bg-showmore-action-6a8e7254e80689042562102' class='bg-showmore-plg-button bg-green-button  '   style=\" color:#D9ECFB;\">Long post is long. Click to read the story.<\/button><div id='bg-showmore-hidden-6a8e7254e80689042562102' ><\/p>\n<h2 class=\"chapterhead\">49.<br \/>\n<u>Sacrifice Play<\/u><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cThat is such total <i>horse shit<\/i>,\u201d Kyra exploded.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack, who had just finished describing Paris Ogilvie\u2019s death, found herself staring in confusion at her sister\u2026 as did everyone else in the room.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Ewan, Tafrara, and Izil had come back up with the two of them after lunch to hear more of the eclipse story, this time bringing tea with them. Ewan was, at that moment, helping Kyra through her physical therapy stretches; he had frozen in place, looking between her and Jack with growing concern.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cShe thinks it\u2019s her fault that Paris guy died,\u201d Kyra added in response to the quizzical looks she was getting. \u201cJesus <i>fuck,<\/i> it\u2019s one of the reasons she slashed her <i>wrists.<\/i> What the <i>hell,<\/i> Tizzy?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cIt <i>was<\/i> my fault\u2014\u201d Jack began.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cWhy? Because he dropped a flashlight and you tried to pick it up?\u201d Kyra rolled her eyes.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cTrying to pick up that <i>flashlight<\/i> cost us all of the fiberoptic light,\u201d Jack protested.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cBecause <i>he<\/i> panicked and pulled the power generator over!\u201d Kyra argued back.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cHe wouldn\u2019t have panicked if I\u2019d just\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cHold on, Tizzy,\u201d Tafrara said, her voice gentle. \u201cDihya. Both of you. Am I understanding the chain of events correctly here? Paris used up the fuel for the cutting torch, carrying it as a secondary light source while already fully protected by fiberoptics, yes?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack nodded slowly.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAnd when it went out, he immediately grabbed for another <i>unnecessary<\/i> secondary light source, knocking one of the flashlights out of the bin he\u2019d reached into?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYeah\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAnd he made no effort to pick it up?\u201d Tafrara continued.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack, feeling more and more like she was trapped on a witness stand, shook her head. \u201cNo\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAnd then you said what, again?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI said, \u2018wait,\u2019\u201d Jack admitted, starting to see where Tafrara was going.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cDid they?\u201d Izil asked, joining in. Sebby was snoozing on the zoologist\u2019s folded legs.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cNot right away\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cIf they had waited when you asked,\u201d Ewan asked, \u201cwould you have needed to remove your fiberoptic coil to reach the flashlight?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI\u2026\u201d Jack closed her eyes, recalling that moment, feeling Kyra exploring it in her head as she did. She had already begun to turn back for the flashlight, which had still been within the protective halo of light surrounding them, when she\u2019d felt the coil tightening around her; the others weren\u2019t waiting. She had shrugged out of the coil, dropping low to the ground to present less of a target and struggling to let her eyes adjust as she reached for the flashlight, where it had rolled into what had become deep gloom. \u201cNo\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cWhen <i>did<\/i> they stop?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack didn\u2019t know for sure. Her fingertips had just touched the barrel of the flashlight when she heard Imam shout and felt him tackle her, even as something monstrous shrieked above her and they rolled to the side. Everything after that had been a blur, gunshots echoing, Imam asking her if she was all right, Paris babbling nearby\u2014<i>this can\u2019t be happening, this can\u2019t be happening<\/i>\u2014and then the crash of the generator as it toppled over, its whine as it shorted out and powered down, and the coils she was shrugging back into going dark\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Silence had fallen over the group for a terrible moment, and then she\u2019d heard Paris\u2019s final whisper. \u201cI was supposed to die in <i>France.<\/i> I never even <i>saw<\/i> France\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Fire had exploded in the night and she\u2019d caught one last glimpse of him, collapsing, surrounded by the monsters that had been following them\u2026 following <i>her.<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack wiped at her eyes. Thinking of his death still <i>hurt.<\/i> Kyra and the others might think of the story as somehow being all about Riddick, and she\u2019d been telling it that way for Kyra\u2019s sake, but before their deaths, <i>Shazza and Paris<\/i> had been the stars of <i>her<\/i> story, the two adult survivors whom she had spent the most time with, bonded the most closely with, and felt the most powerful connections to. Both of them had spoken of helping her reach her planned destination once they got off of that godforsaken rock\u2026 and each of them had also offered to take her with them and watch over her if she <i>had<\/i> no destination.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Paris had even offered to cut her in on the Mona Lisa heist if she wanted to travel to Earth with him. He\u2019d had little fear of the deadly security systems surrounding it, had been excited by the challenge of facing them down\u2026 but the unpredictable organic threats of the crash planet had turned out to be more than he could cope with.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Feeling him being devoured alive by the monsters had nearly undone her. Feeling Riddick\u2019s gaze shift to her, knowing he was thinking <i>it\u2019s <b>her<\/b> they\u2019re after\u2014<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">She\u2019d thought, at the time, that she\u2019d been imagining all of that. Now that she knew better, it just made everything worse.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cThey got him because they were after <i>me,<\/i>\u201d she said, switching arguments even though she knew she was doing something her mother called <i>moving the goal posts.<\/i> \u201cThey weren\u2019t following the rest of the group. Just <i>me.<\/i> They could smell my blood. <i>That\u2019s<\/i> why it\u2019s my fault.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cBecause you were menstruating?\u201d Ewan asked. His matter-of-fact question startled Jack; back on Deckard\u2019s World, boys and men seemed to go to great lengths to avoid thinking, much less talking, about the messier aspects of female anatomy. A few months before she\u2019d run away, some of her nosier classmates had discovered that she had tampons in her backpack and had <i>freaked out\u2026<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">She nodded, still not fathoming why he seemed so relaxed about the subject. She\u2019d thought for sure it would disgust him and Izil when she\u2019d mentioned having to find a way to sneak off for a few harrowing minutes to deal with her period, but both men had acted as if the only disturbing elements of that sequence were the creatures that could have been lurking in any shadow. \u201cI\u2019d run out of tampons right before the eclipse, and by the time we were ready to run, I was on my last pad. All I\u2019d had was my emergency stash. And my flow was just starting, so it was super heavy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">There <i>were<\/i> more pads that she\u2019d found in the settlement and stashed on board the skiff, but hadn\u2019t had a chance to grab, although they were a few decades old and she\u2019d been dreading using them. She\u2019d been right, too; after twenty-two years of abandonment, gritty desert dust had insinuated its way into them and it had felt, a few times, like putting sandpaper between her legs\u2014<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAnd asking someone to help you find more, or an alternative, would have broken your masquerade.\u201d There was no judgment in Ewan\u2019s voice. Why did she feel like there should be?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYeah,\u201d she muttered, wishing she could disappear into a hole.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cSo, let\u2019s get this all straight,\u201d Kyra said, her voice brisk and a little hard. \u201cThese people barely listened to a word you said a lot of the time, and a few of them were practically at each other\u2019s throats, but you were supposed to trust them enough to tell them you were really a girl and that you needed more tampons\u2014assuming there even were any to give you\u2014just in case Riddick was right about the monsters smelling blood?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI\u2026\u201d When Kyra put it like that\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAnd this Paris guy <i>wasted all of the cutting torch\u2019s fuel<\/i>, even though the group might need it to actually <i>cut<\/i> stuff with,\u201d Kyra continued, \u201cand when it was all gone, he lost one flashlight while trying to grab another one\u2026 and it\u2019s your fault he was being wasteful and panicky?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack didn\u2019t know what to say.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAnd then, when you called out \u2018wait,\u2019 to the rest of the group, and they <i>didn\u2019t<\/i>, and you had to take off your own light protection to reach the flashlight as a result, it\u2019s what\u2026 all your fault?\u201d\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\"><i>Yes,<\/i> her inner voice insisted. She\u2019d put that one flashlight ahead of all the rest of the light\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cOh for God\u2019s sake,\u201d Kyra grumbled. \u201cI can <i>hear<\/i> what you\u2019re thinking, you know. C\u2019mon. Admit it. They told you before you started running that every bit of light was valuable and you should conserve it all carefully, right? Which is what you were trying to <i>do<\/i> even as Paris was doing the opposite.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYou would make an excellent lawyer,\u201d Izil chuckled, pouring another round of mint tea for everyone while stroking Sebby\u2019s exoskeleton.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cSo now, let\u2019s see,\u201d Kyra went on, quirking an eyebrow at Izil as she stretched over and picked up her cup. \u201c<i>You<\/i> get attacked, that hoodoo realizes in time and manages to save you, Johns starts firing his shotgun into the darkness at them even though they\u2019re still <i>staying away from the light<\/i>, and it\u2019s your fault that Paris flips his shit and starts scuttling away from the safety of the sled and the light? And drags the whole generator contraption over and breaks it in the process?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cThe very thing you avoided doing by taking your light coils off, I\u2019d like to add,\u201d Tafrara said.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cIt\u2019s just\u2026\u201d Jack didn\u2019t know how to explain it now. Everything they were saying made sense to her head, but the rest of her was insisting that it was all her doing, her fault.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI know you don\u2019t like hearing this, and God knows, we all have a hard time remembering it about you ourselves,\u201d Ewan said to her, locking eyes with her, \u201cbut you\u2019re only thirteen years old. <i>You<\/i> were not supposed to be responsible for <i>their<\/i> well-being. I know you were trying very hard to pull your weight without any complaints after the way Johns tried to use your fear as an argument against the run. Weren\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Yes, Jack realized. That was a huge part of it. She\u2019d tried to buck up, <i>butch<\/i> up, be as helpful as possible\u2026 but after how unwelcome her attempts to suggest a way to revive the sand cat had been, the thought of confiding in any of them that she was bleeding had been daunting to the point of nausea.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201c<i>You<\/i> held your own while one of the adults in charge of the situation went to pieces over a threat that hadn\u2019t even been aimed at him,\u201d Ewan continued. He was all she could see now, his eyes holding hers in their thrall. \u201cThat kind of panic <i>can<\/i> happen to anyone. Soldiers panic under fire, too. In my field training, we were taught to move as a unit, to retreat as a unit\u2026 to never, ever, break formation and run. But the first time you\u2019re under live fire, there\u2019s no telling what will happen, and there\u2019s almost always someone who panics. It\u2019s usually not who you\u2019d expect, either. Sometimes the steadiest-seeming people can lose their minds. I\u2019m not trying to shift all the blame onto Paris, here. <i>But.<\/i> If he was that close to all-out panic, and it does sound like he was given the other mistakes he was making, something was inevitably going to trigger it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cBut it was <i>me,<\/i>\u201d Jack heard herself saying. \u201cWhy did it have to be <i>me?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Ewan looked at Kyra, and then at the others, a question in his expression. When they all seemed to assent, he moved to Jack\u2019s side, sat down behind her, wrapped his arms around her, and drew her into his lap. She leaned against him, struggling for a moment not to cry before giving in and letting him hold her through it. For once, her stupid hormones didn\u2019t get in the way, although she almost wished they would if it might have broken her dark mood and driven off the tears and misery.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">He seemed prepared for everything, giving her a handkerchief from his pocket to use to wipe her eyes and nose. His arms stayed around her even after she recovered. Things were, she thought, almost like they\u2019d been before that <i>moment<\/i> on the beach. She rested her head against his shoulder, glad that she could just\u2026 <i>be\u2026<\/i> for a while. When he brought her teacup to her lips, she sipped gratefully, feeling at home and at peace in a way that she hadn\u2019t in a long time.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cSo I\u2019m guessing that nobody knew how to fix the lights, and you had to switch to all of those liquor bottles,\u201d Kyra prompted, managing to time her question for right when Jack began feeling ready to tell more of the story.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYeah,\u201d she said. \u201cFry lit a flare, and the rest of us used the bottles after she lit them for us. We dumped the fiberoptics and the light generator off the sled and kept going\u2026 a little faster now that Johns and Imam didn\u2019t have to carry as much weight. It felt like we were walking forever. I asked Fry if we were getting close to the settlement yet\u2026 and that\u2019s when we reached the sled tracks.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cWait\u2026\u201d Izil said.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cShit,\u201d Kyra muttered.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYour sled\u2019s tracks? You had gone in a circle?\u201d Tafrara asked.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack nodded. \u201cEverybody thought Riddick had gotten lost. But it was worse than that. We were almost at the canyon\u2026 and it was <i>full<\/i> of those creatures. He said he\u2019d \u2018circled once to buy some time to think.\u2019 And I guess he\u2019d decided my secret wasn\u2019t going to keep anymore. He told them I was bleeding. He told them I was a <i>girl<\/i> and I was <i>bleeding.<\/i>\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201c<i>Tayr-iw<\/i>, I am so sorry,\u201d Ewan murmured in her ear. Tafrara gave him an odd look.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI tried to explain it\u2026 why I\u2019d done it\u2026 I mean, posed as a guy\u2026 When I was <i>twelve<\/i>, back home, these older guys started hitting on me all the time, asking gross stuff like what I had on under my skirt, and did my \u2018carpet\u2019 match my \u2018drapes\u2019 and shit, until my mom would come roaring out at them and threaten to have them arrested for messing with a kid. A lot of girls at my school were getting picked on like that, some of them were even getting <i>groped,<\/i> and I thought, maybe if nobody knew I was a girl, <i>especially<\/i> a girl on her own\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYou\u2019d be safer, yes,\u201d Ewan nodded. \u201cSomewhat, at least.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAnd after Riddick warned me about my blood, back at the ship, I was afraid they\u2019d just <i>leave<\/i> me there if they knew. Fry said she wouldn\u2019t do that, but I could <i>see<\/i> the way everybody else was looking at me, like I was a whole different person.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cShit, that\u2019s <i>it<\/i>,\u201d Kyra gasped. \u201cThat\u2019s what changed.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">The others looked at her inquiringly.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI\u2019ve been trying to figure out why that Imam guy went from being so nice to you and protective of you to being\u2026 well, the total dickhead <i>I<\/i> saw at the hospital, nothing <i>like<\/i> how you\u2019ve been portraying him. It all started changing when you weren\u2019t a boy anymore, didn\u2019t it?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\"><i>Did<\/i> it?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">After Fry had left her alone with Imam in the cave, he\u2019d seemed unable to meet her eyes most of the time. It had been awkward, waiting to find out if they would live or die, with a strange wall up between them. She\u2019d just thought maybe it was his grief over the other boys, or the circumstances of their possible last moments, the chance that the cave might become their tomb\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u2026but it had never really gotten better after that.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">He\u2019d taken it upon himself to act as a chaperone between her and Riddick the rest of the time the three of them had spent together\u2014as if Riddick was lying in wait to defile her the moment his guard dropped\u2014to the point where the two of them had begun coming up with elaborately sneaky ways to steal conversations with one another whenever the Holy Man slept. Riddick\u2019s hearing was every bit as acute as hers, and they\u2019d sometimes spent hours conversing in the tiniest threads of whispers just so they could speak freely.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\"><i>If I\u2019d managed to tell Riddick about the sand cat, would he have made them listen?<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">He had, after all, spent a great deal of time on the skiff listening to her, and telling her things that \u201cresponsible adults\u201d would have found questionable but that he apparently felt she needed to know about the big bad \u2019verse she was venturing out into. <i>His<\/i> attitude toward her, inscrutable as it sometimes was, hadn\u2019t really changed. But\u2014<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI think you\u2019re right,\u201d Jack told the family, <i>her<\/i> family, surrounding her. \u201cI think\u2026 once Imam knew I was a girl\u2026 he didn\u2019t know how to relate to me anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">The revelation had broken the group, too.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cFry decided she\u2019d been wrong, the run wasn\u2019t going to work, and we should head back to the crash ship. But Johns\u2026\u201d She swallowed. This was the ugly part. \u201cNow <i>he<\/i> wanted to keep going.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Kyra, reading from her mind the truth she was preparing to spill, gasped. \u201cOh, that motherfucking son of a\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">When she trailed off, Ewan drew in a breath.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cDon\u2019t you <i>dare<\/i> say it,\u201d Tafrara scolded him.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">There suddenly seemed to be a hidden wellspring of laughter between sister and brother, in spite of the fierce scowl she had aimed his way.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cSay what?\u201d Jack asked.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cEwan Zdan brought home some really <i>filthy<\/i> phrases after he attended the basic training segment of the Tangiers Military Academy,\u201d Izil explained, his eyes twinkling. \u201cThere\u2019s one in particular that he still sometimes says about someone he truly reviles.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cOkay,\u201d Kyra said, grinning. \u201cNow you <i>have<\/i> to share.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Tafrara rolled her eyes and then nodded at Ewan, sighing.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Ewan\u2019s expression was pure mischief. The Tamazight words that rolled off his tongue were the same ones he\u2019d used the other night when he\u2019d apparently been maligning Toombs, the words that had made every woman at the dinner table glare at him.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cOkay,\u201d Kyra said after nothing else was forthcoming, \u201cand\u2026 it means?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYou want me to say that in <i>English<\/i>?\u201d Ewan asked, looking mock-scandalized.\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cIt means,\u201d Tafrara grumbled, \u201c\u2018he fucked his pig mother to death and then ate her bacon the morning after.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cAll I was going to add to what Dihya said was \u2018side of bacon,\u2019\u201d Ewan insisted, his expression the picture of innocence.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cThat motherfucking son of a side of bacon\u2026\u201d Kyra began to cackle with delight.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack couldn\u2019t help snickering, too. \u201cNice,\u201d she said, tilting her head to look up at him. \u201cYou\u2019ve got incest, bestiality, matricide, cannibalism, and <i>haram<\/i> all rolled into one insult there.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cExactly,\u201d Ewan laughed, his gaze upon her turning heart-stoppingly wicked just for an instant before he adopted a look of cherubic innocence again.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYou see now just how much trouble my baby brother truly is,\u201d Tafrara snorted. \u201cSo. Now that we have established the heritage, proclivities, crimes, and dietary practices of this \u2018Johns,\u2019 why did he want to keep going and what made it so awful?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Stifling a groan, Jack described the verbal battle that had followed, as Johns threw everything Fry had said to him\u2014<i>ever<\/i>\u2014back in her face and attempted to annihilate her authority by revealing that she\u2019d panicked during the crash and almost jettisoned the passenger compartment. Even now, that was something Jack couldn\u2019t bring herself to believe about Fry, but the pilot had never <i>denied<\/i> it, Johns\u2019 words driving her instead into a frenzy so desperate that she\u2019d tried to physically assault him and had ended up knocked to the ground.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">That time, it had been Imam who had stepped in\u2014<i>\u201cYou\u2019ve made your point. We have all been scared!\u201d<\/i>\u2014before Johns announced that the matter was decided and they were going through the canyon. What little bit of democracy the group had possessed had, seemingly, been swept away.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYou think that\u2019s your fault, too, don\u2019t you?\u201d Kyra asked, almost glaring at her. \u201cYou think you gave him that opportunity to take over. Tizzy, he was gonna come up with <i>something<\/i> to use an excuse to make his move. Like you keep telling me, mercs\u2019ll use up anybody for a percentage.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cIt was still\u2026\u201d Jack stopped. She could see that none of them agreed with her.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cDidn\u2019t anybody at that damned hospital help you through <i>any<\/i> of this?\u201d Ewan suddenly asked.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack shook her head. \u201cThey were too busy trying to get me to \u2018admit\u2019 that none of it ever happened, and that Riddick had killed everybody else and taken Imam and me hostage.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201c\u2026The <i>hell?<\/i> The official investigation report says that there <i>is<\/i> hostile life on that planet.\u201d Ewan\u2019s arms tightened around her a little. He looked outraged. \u201cGranted, it also tries to claim that Riddick used that as cover for some murders and took you hostage, but\u2026 they tried to deny <i>every<\/i> aspect of your story?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cShe never got a chance to tell it,\u201d Kyra sighed. \u201cThey started bulldozing her from the get-go. You know, there were actually a bunch of <i>really good<\/i> therapists on the staff, like this one woman named after a Greek muse who asked me to just call her Polly\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cOh, I met her,\u201d Jack grumbled. \u201cMaybe she\u2019s great for actual <i>survivors<\/i> of sexual abuse like you, but she walked into <i>our<\/i> sessions trying to get me to \u2018face\u2019 the \u2018fact\u2019 that Riddick had raped me\u2014\u201d\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Against her back, she felt Ewan tense up.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201c\u2014which is a load of bullshit because I\u2019m still a virgin and he never so much as <i>looked<\/i> at me that way.\u201d She felt Ewan relaxing again. Whew. \u201cHe never threatened me, or any of us. The whole time we were on that planet, the only person he ever tried to hurt, let alone kill, was Johns.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Which brought her, at last, to the merc\u2019s\u2026 <i>bacon<\/i> lineage.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">And an admission of just how good her hearing actually was. Somehow, whether via her crazy-acute hearing or something <i>else<\/i> that she hadn\u2019t consciously known about herself back then, she\u2019d overheard every word Johns and Riddick had said to each other.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">She replayed the entire conversation for everyone, as the merc attempted to buddy up to his former captive with a promise that Riddick would survive the journey and go free if he cooperated with the \u201csacrifice play\u201d Johns wanted to run: kill one of the four civilians and use their body to draw the predators in the canyon away from everyone else.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Even then, Jack had known that Johns wanted it to be either Carolyn Fry or her, and the only really logical choice would be <i>her.<\/i> If he had any plans of stiffing Riddick, he\u2019d still need Fry to pilot the skiff.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Riddick was playing coy. She wasn\u2019t sure why at first. But he kept doing things\u2014expansive gestures and turns to look back at the group\u2014that seemed designed to draw the others\u2019 attention\u2026 clue them in\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cI think Riddick was trying to warn us,\u201d she said after a moment. \u201cI\u2019d asked Imam what they were talking about. I don\u2019t think <i>he<\/i> could hear a damned thing. Or if he could, he didn\u2019t want to admit it was anything that bad. He told me they were probably talking about how to get through the canyon.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Which, technically, was true, but\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Finally, Johns had enough. He gave up dancing around the subject, since Riddick was refusing to be his dance partner. <i>\u201cYou do the girl, and I\u2019ll keep the others off your back\u2026\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cYeah, right,\u201d Kyra snarled. \u201cNot that he ever <i>would<\/i> have, but if Riddick <i>had<\/i> killed you, nobody else in the group would\u2019ve trusted him, ever again, or lifted a <i>finger<\/i> to stop Johns from taking him back into custody. <i>He<\/i> was probably counting on them helping him put Riddick back in chains when they <i>got<\/i> to the skiff.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack, who had earlier described seeing Johns furtively sneaking a set of restraints onto the skiff hours before the eclipse, and who had found them crushing half of her gritty sanitary pads when she finally went to get one before the launch, just nodded.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Maybe that was the only reason Riddick had balked. Maybe he\u2019d known his chance of ever being a free man would be lost if he added <i>her<\/i> to his kill count. Maybe that was all defending her, in that moment, had meant to him. While part of her still clutched at all the many small kindnesses he had shown her, he <i>had<\/i> still outed her to the others and then abandoned her in the repressive al-Walid household. It was hard to reconcile those two Riddicks and divine which one had turned to Johns and said, <i>\u201cI\u2019m just wondering if we don\u2019t need a bigger piece of bait.\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Four voices whooped with vindication and triumph, cheering him on, when she said that line in her \u201cRiddick voice.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">The moment the two men began to fight, the moment Johns\u2019 shotgun started firing into the night, Fry had pulled them all into a headlong sprint away from the battle zone. Jack hadn\u2019t been wrong; the strange tension between the three of them was ending in bloodshed, which might spiral out to encompass all of them. Just how long they ran she wasn\u2019t sure. With no idea where they were going, they had followed the tracks of the sled itself, blindly and unthinkingly\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u2026and, of course, they had circled the way it had, and found themselves confronted by Riddick.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cBack to the ship, huh?\u201d he\u2019d asked. \u201cJust huddle together \u2019til the lights burn out? \u2019Til you can\u2019t see what\u2019s eating you? That the big plan?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Johns was dead. Jack didn\u2019t know whether Riddick had killed him or whether the creatures had, and she didn\u2019t dare ask. None of them did.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cWe\u2019re gonna lose everybody out here,\u201d she\u2019d found herself saying, no longer bothering to try to drop her voice down into a \u2018boy\u2019 range. \u201cWe should\u2019ve stayed at the ship.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\"><i>I should\u2019ve let them leave me behind\u2026<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cOh god<i>damn<\/i> it, I fucking <i>heard<\/i> that, Tizzy\u2026\u201d Kyra groaned. \u201cYou still think everybody\u2019d have ridden off into the sunrise if they\u2019d just abandoned you? Or sacrificed you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cIt\u2019s a kind of magical thinking,\u201d Ewan murmured, one hand stroking her hair. \u201cI\u2019ve seen it before, usually with people struggling with survivor\u2019s guilt. You get basic counseling training when you\u2019re a paramedic, or at least I did, and we were warned that this was something that we might see happen to someone trying to cope with fresh trauma\u2026 the wish to trade places with the ones who were lost. People in crisis often want to find something they can offer as a sacrifice, bargain away, to make everything go back to normal. Sometimes, those dealing with survivor\u2019s guilt want that sacrifice to be themselves, so that everything will be <i>right<\/i> again and the guilt they feel will be absolved. But Tizzy, it\u2019s an illusion, both the blame you\u2019re taking on and what you wished to do to fix it. The world will <i>not<\/i> become better if you are lost from it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cEspecially not for any of us,\u201d Tafrara agreed, her voice soft and sad.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">Jack nodded as Ewan held her, trying to believe, wishing she <i>could<\/i> believe. It was probably better consolation than she\u2019d gotten months earlier, when Riddick had been the one trying to tell her something that maybe he\u2019d thought would be reassuring\u2014<i>\u201cHe died fast, and if we have any choice about it, that\u2019s the way we should all go out\u201d<\/i>\u2014as he walked up to stand scant inches behind her. She\u2019d felt the heat of his body radiating against her back, felt his eyes on her, felt his hand reaching out toward her for a second before it withdrew.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\"><i>This is it,<\/i> she had thought.  <i>If he\u2019s gonna kill me, this is when it\u2019ll happen.<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">But his voice, dark and rough and yet somehow <i>gentle<\/i>, had filled her ears instead. \u201cDon\u2019t you cry for Johns. Don\u2019t you dare.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">And he\u2019d walked away.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">She didn\u2019t know what was more disturbing now: the fact that she had been prepared to let him cut her throat without a fight, if that was his plan\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u2026or the fact that part of her had been disappointed when he <i>hadn\u2019t.<\/i><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-indent:1em;margin-bottom: 0\">\u201cFucking shit, Tizzy,\u201d Kyra groaned. \u201cFucking <i>shit.<\/i>\u201d<\/p>\n<p><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Title: The Changeling Game (Formerly Identity Theft) Author: Ardath Rekha Chapter: 49\/? Fandom: Pitch Black (2000); The Chronicles of Riddick (2004); The Chronicles of Riddick: Dark Fury (2004) Rat","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"bgseo_title":"\u201cThe Changeling Game\u201d 49: \u201cSacrifice Play\u201d","bgseo_description":"Jack\u2019s interpretation of part of the eclipse story, as she tells it, becomes a bone of contention and spurs a long-overdue intervention\u2026 but will it help enough?","bgseo_robots_index":"index","bgseo_robots_follow":"follow","footnotes":""},"categories":[9,21],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-574","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fan-fiction","category-the-changeling-game"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/574","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=574"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/574\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1175,"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/574\/revisions\/1175"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=574"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=574"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ardath-rekha.com\/wips\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=574"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}